Friday, May 16, 2008

Friday night in the big town............

Well long time, no post!! Spring has sprung and we are now quickly transitioning to summer mode. The weather has been so pleasant and the days getting so much longer, we are getting shorter on sleep and crankier by the day, as we count down the days until the end of school. The last month of school has been chock full of field trips, celebration days, super kids days, award ceremonies, teacher appreciation week, and on, and on. Quite frankly, it seems we quit having school about a month ago and we're all just coasting until May 22, 2008. Just in case you think I might be upset about this, NO I'M NOT!! I am loving these easygoing, no homework evenings as we are running around to t-ball games and end of the year events. Only 4 more days to go now, but who's counting? Logan has decided that he only wants to go to 2nd grade if he can have his same teacher. Logan has had one of the best 1st grade teachers on the planet this year and has really thrived under her teaching. He has become an avid reader and is currently reading on a 4th grade level. He rec'd the top speller award as well (following in his mother's footsteps with a natural ability to spell). He did not, however, win the penmanship award despite his ongoing efforts to teach himself to write in cursive. He has taken to school with ease and we couldn't be more pleased with his success this year. I know he's ready for a break and is excited about all the field trips he's getting to go on over the summer.
I am cutting back my days at work to 2/week for the summer to spend the most time possible with the kids. On those days the kids will continue to go to the daycare where they go after school now. They have a neat summer program for the boys with an "Around the World" theme this summer. The boys will get to go on trips to lots of fun places, have water/swim days, etc. It is not cheap but cheaper than I could take them most of those places as they get group discounts. I also promised the boys that I would take each of them separately wherever they wanted to go as a 1-on-1 day with mom. I am relishing the fact that at least for now this really excites them. I want to stay 'cool' as long as possible.
I had my first big episode of life lesson/accountability with Logan this past week. His school hosted a Ned's YOYO show (part of those crazy non-educational days we've been having) last week and of course there were yoyos to purchase for the bargain price of $6.50. Logan apparently mentioned this to his father who proceeded to tell him that he could use his own money (what money?) but he wasn't providing it. So Logan in his creativity basically pulled a fast one over on his sweet, unsuspecting brother by convincing him that he would share this 'really cool' yoyo if Garrett would give him the money to buy it. (Garrett just happened to have $6.50 in his piggy bank.) So the two of them gathered the funds, zipped it up in a zip-loc baggie, and stashed it away in Logan's backpack while mom was none the wiser. Unbeknownst to Logan I was looking through his backpack as I do every day and found the ziploc, counted the money, and not knowing what it was for, questioned it. When Logan became quiet and remorseful looking, I knew something was up. He reluctantly confessed what they had done. Now this discovery of mine happened in the morning on our way out the door to school so while I confiscated the yoyo fund, I simply reminded Logan that this was not ok and while I loved him none the less, we'd resolve it that evening. I must admit that as I was driving home from work several hrs later, after I had relaxed from my initial dislike of his dishonesty I was feeling somewhat softer and really dreading the confrontation ahead. It really is true what they say about punishment being harder on the parent that the child. I marched into the house determined to stick to my guns with the decision I'd made that morning to make the punishment suitable to the crime. Long story shorter, Logan was not allowed to purchase the yoyo even with his own money as he went about it the wrong way, lesson learned, another year shaved off mom's life.
I hope that with each of these parenting challenges I will become more hardened to the pain of punishment necessary for the ultimate good in the raising of my precious children. I know I've spoken recently of my own sadness as I am leaving my years as mother of preschoolers behind and transitioning to mother of school agers. I continue to reap the benefits of older children like more sleep, fewer diapers, independent seatbelt management, improved communication, etc, however the new challenges seem even bigger. Now I am trying to instill respect for authority, love for education, healthy lifestyle choices, prudent decision-making, etc, in a world that seems to teach just the opposite. WOW, what a huge responsibility.
I have had this book for a few years now that is by an author that wrote some books related to pregnancy and parenting of small children that I found both very humorous and helpful as I was passing through those years of my life. This book is entitled something like "Getting you Groove Back" and addresses many of the issues I am now encountering in my daily life. As I said I've had the book for a while now but have never actually read it b/c it didn't seem applicable until now. I've been reading it a little at a time as it has the tendency to make me even more crazy as she is bringing up issues that I am likely to face but just haven't come up yet. I guess forewarned is forearmed.
On a lighter note, I had a nice Mother's Day with my precious family. We went to church and came home for a quiet afternoon. Mark really tried hard this year and got me a great gift and coached the kids not to spill the beans before the big day. Garrett actually let it slip twice but the funny thing was he didn't even realize it. When I opened the gift he was like, "Isn't that the best surprise ever, Mom?" It was priceless! I've been reflecting on what it means to be a mom as I try every day to be an even better mom. I tend to beat myself up when I don't feel perfect but it leaves lots of room to do better the next day. I've really been taking it one day at a time and appreciating the small things, converations in the car, hugs when you least expect them, even growing together through life's lessons that require punishment.

I started a long time ago keeping a journal for each of my kids to jot down funny things they did as kids, special attachments, 1st favorite movies, etc. Just stuff that I know I won't remember down the road as my brain gets more and more crowded with information. As you might imagine, maintaining these journals is a chore in itself, so I am continually jotting down little blurbs on random post-it notes. These are a few of my random notes and thoughts related to the joy/pain of what it means/involves to be a mom.
1) Secretion manager: Moms are expected to be prepared to wipe, scoop, dry, or provide any other maintainance of secretions of any sort without generating a gag reflex. Fortunately God seems to build something into moms that makes the possible with your own kids, although it's a little harder with other people's kids. This week Addi was riding in the back of the van with her bubbas (something she loves to do) and Garrett says, "hey mom, Addi has a snotty nose and needs a tissue, no wait she's lickin' it, yep she got it all!"
2)Fashion coordinator: When a mom picks out clothing for the day, so much goes into that decision than meets the eye. For example when Mark picks out an outfit it is basically a shirt, pants, shoes and socks. They might match and they are generally weather appropriate. When a mom picks out the wardrobe for the day she is taking into account the events of the day-including potential to transition from general play to dinner out with company, weather -including OK sudden weather shifts, menu at school (no white on spaghetti day), P.E. day or not, school dress code, and lastly whether or not the child even likes that outfit b/c if they don't and you just bought it b/c you liked it and it looks nice they are guaranteed to complain!!
3)First Aid: (a big one at our house) You all know about Addi's recent misadventures with injuries so we are still on heightend alert with regards to her safety. The other day as I'm routinely transferring the laundry from washer to dryer, I hear a undisputable shriek from the living room where Garrett and Addi were actually playing harmoniously just seconds before as I passes through. I go running and am met by a very scared looking Garrett who is coming to get me dragging Addi along by one arm as they are leaving a trail of Addi's blood behind them. Apparently Addi was 'surfing' (being pushed by Garrett on one of my laundry baskets turned upside-down with Addi standing on top). The surfer landed on the pusher face first and proceeded to bite her tongue in 2 places, bloody her nose, and bust her top and bottom lips.....lots of blood. Besides looking like she was in a fist fight I am happy to say she's fine and making a speedy recovery, already surfing again!!
4)Time management- Coordinating the lives of 5 very busy individuals is one of my biggest jobs which brings me to my conclusion for tonight. It is 12:09 am and I need some sleep. More later, all my love,

Traci